Some People

I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. When things first happen, most of the time you don't have a clue as to why. The LORD shows you his reasons (sometimes) later. February of 2009, life was great. We lived in a small apartment, but it was comfortable. We were happy. We had moved every year for one reason another our entire marriage. We couldn't get situated. February of 2009 our lease was up for our apartment, and for the first time ever, we were going to renew our one year lease, and actually stay put. We renewed, and then within 3 days, Kevin was promoted to store manager in Bend, Oregon. We were terrified, but excited. The money was promised to be great. Kevin left first, as he had to start his new job. The girls and I stayed and packed and got ready to move to Oregon. I was sad. I was also trying to think about my babies. I didn't want to leave Washington even slightly. I didn't even want to leave Richland for crying out loud. But, Kevin is our provider, and that is where the money was. We thought. We got down there, and rented us a huge, gorgeous house. I loved that house. It was 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, and 2500 square feet of pure loneliness. I don't think I have ever in my entire life been as depressed as when we were in Oregon. The money that they "promised" was not half it cracked up to be. His bonuses (promised at around $1200 a month) ended up being closer to $200 a month. We should've read the fine print better, I suppose. He left for work at about 630-700am, and got home around 9pm. Monday through Saturday. He was home on Sundays. Kevin was so stressed out about work all of the time. It worried me how much pressure he felt. He looked sick. He got phone calls all of the time, even when he was home. He was the boss, and his employees called him constantly at home. So most of the time, it was Kailyn, Abby and I, alone in that big old house. We tried to do fun things and make the most of it. I tried to meet the neighbors. I tried to be happy. But I longed to come home. I did come home often to visit. But I longed for my husband. If I was in Oregon, I missed everybody here. If I was here, I missed my husband. I felt like I couldn't win. I cried. A lot. I would put Abby to bed, and go take a shower in the middle of the day just to cry without Kailyn seeing it. I was so depressed I could barely function. I tried. But the mix of loneliness, and seeing Kevin so stressed out, the lack of the promised money, Kailyn begging several times a day to go "home", and everything else, just hurt so bad. The money, after all was said and done (taxes, cost of living, etc) was VERY similar to his pay as assistant manager here in Tri-Cities. So he called his old boss from Tri-Cities and asked them if he could just have his old job back. There was no use in any of us going through that, if we were not gaining anything from it. They said yes, and we were incredibly excited. He put in his "30 day notice of intent to demote himself" to his boss in Oregon. She was pissed. Livid. Frothing at the mouth. She was a rabid bitch. She told him "just leave now, give me your keys and go now". My first thought "YAY we dont have to wait 30 days to leave" followed VERY closely by "Now we have to pack, move, and find a place to live in how long?!" Kevin called his boss here in WA and told him what had happened. They allowed him to use his sick days, vacation days, and everything he had left. It added up to 5 days. So we had 5 days to pack, and get our butts back to Washington. It was hard, but we were so excited about coming back, that it made it easier. We got back to Washington, and put all of our things in a storage unit. We stayed at my parents house, and started looking for a home to rent. We looked and looked, and looked some more. Rent prices were ridiculous. We had been paying $700 a month for our apartment before we moved. It was 3bedrooms and 2 bathrooms. They were full. We called other apartments, and the cheapest rent we could find for a 3 bedroom was around $1,000 a month. So we called a mortgage lender. He ran our credit, took our information, and told us that we had hope. We would not be approved right then and there, but it wasn't beyond repair. The next seven months, we stayed with whoever wanted us. We lived out of totes. We stayed at my parents house for the first three months. You see, moving out of state costs a lot of money. We had no savings. We had nothing but bills to pay, and not very much money to do it with. We had to borrow money to help pay for the U-Haul to come home in. We were in the hole. Even if we wanted to run out and find even a rental, we didn't have the means to pay first months rent and the deposit. It took everything we had financially just to come home. We thought we would have the 30 days to prepare financially to pay the costs. We didn't. We thought we would be making a lot more money in Oregon. We weren't. We had no money, no place to live, and were feeling pretty dang hopeless and depressed. We thought the move to Oregon would benefit our family. It didn't. The first few months, we stayed with my parents. They have a 1,000 square foot house, with three bedrooms and one bathroom. Between my parents, Alisha (my niece), Kevin, Kailyn, Abigale and I... It was cramped to say the least. We were constantly on each others toes. But they were trying to help us. Things didn't go very smoothly there, and we ended up fighting a lot. Mostly between my dad and I. We both have very short tempers, and tend to argue when stressed. He wasn't used to having litte ones in the house anymore. One thing lead to another and we had to leave my parents house. We did not leave on good terms with my dad, but we did with mom and Alisha. It broke my heart to be fighting with him. I am a daddy's girl. I love my dad more than you could ever imagine. But when we fight, we do it GOOD. We were not on speaking terms again until very recently. And its still a little shaky. That was so hard to handle. And again, we had to find some place else to stay, and we had no money and nowehere to go. We had been trying to pay off some of our debts and just get back up on our feet while we were there. So that we could find some place to live, and be okay financially. We knew that if we just hurried up and rented a house, with all of our bills and debts, we would drown. We did what we had to do at the time. So we went and stayed with my brother and his family. This arrangement worked a lot better. They just bought a gorgeous, huge new house. We were not in each others way, we all got along fantastically, and I would like to think we even helped each other out with stuff while we there (like cooking, kids and the like) They have 2 young kids as well. Older than mine, but not teenagers yet. The only problem, was that due to their homeowners assocation, they could not allow people to live with them for the first 12 months of them owning their house, and it had only been seven months. So we were allowed to stay for 14 days, then we had to go again. This time, we really felt like we had nowhere to go. "My babies are homeless" was the only thought that kept circling in my mind, like when a song gets stuck in your head. By the Grace of God, we ended up finding a rental. It was a cheap, ran down, 2 bedroom, and the lady was willing to work with us. I was happy. We gave her a check for the deposit, and were trying desperately to save for the first months rent. A little voice inside my head told me to call the bank back and ask if things were ready for us to get a loan. The mortgage lender told us "if you do this one thing, I would bet money you will be approved in about 30-45 days. We prayed and prayed and prayed some more. What is the right thing for us to do? Should we rent this cheap house, and save up money, get back on our feet and buy next year? That seems logical... But we both got the answer back "No, buy now. It will be okay. This is what is best." But HOW?! We dont have the money, we still have some debts, we have nowhere to go! How are we supposed to do that and it be OKAY?! Kevin called his parents. We didnt really want to call his parents to be honest. It felt like a "hey mom and dad, we failed at this and need bailed out..." but it somehow felt right. Thankfully, wonderfully, they agreed that it felt right. They let us come stay at their home. They agreed to help us get back on our feet. I was a little concerned at first. They like their quiet, clean house. 2 small children are anything but quiet and clean. Also, in the midst of all of this, I re-enrolled in college full time. Talk about stressful! But it FELT RIGHT. They also follow the Mormon Doctrine. Kevin and I do not. We like our coffee, we grocery shop on Sundays, and several other things that are not exactly word of wisdom appropriate. I was concerned that the clash of religion would be hard. But we all sat down together in the beginning, and talked about everything that was concerning us. This worked out fabulously! They didn't charge us rent, so that we could financially get back on our own feet. We didnt argue or bicker. We weren't in each others way. (even though there were LOTS of times I felt like we were, they tell us we were not) It was the best thing that anybody could have ever done for our family, and they will never in a million years understand what it meant to us for them to help us so much when we needed it so desperately. We could have gone through with renting that cheap house, but we still would have debts, and still would have been in a hard situation. Through out all of this, we continued to pay debt, put money in savings, repair our credit, and talk to the mortgage lender near daily. He was so incredibly helpful. Finally the time came, after three months, and we were APPROVED. We had just filed our tax return, and it just so happened the amount we were getting back, was VERY similar to the amount we needed to finish paying our debts, and to pay for the downpayment on a house. I was in Wal-Mart in the check out line when Kevin called. He said "So I just talked to Mark (the mortgage guy)." My heart started pounding. "He had some interesting news." Ok... Get on with it! "We were APPROVED!!" I got dizzy. I felt sick. I sat down. In the check out line. Then I looked up at my babies. Kailyn was looking at me like I was crazy, and Abby was sitting in the cart swinging her feet. Kailyn had been sleeping on the floor and hide-a-beds for 7 months. Abigale had been in her play pen for 7 months. With 90% of their belongings in storage. That one word - Approved - meant the world. It meant they could have their beds back. It meant they could have their toys back. Their clothes. Their everything. I looked up at my babies and started to cry. My sister was with us, who is pregnant. She looked at me and started to cry. Then Kailyn and Abby, not knowing what was happening, got scared and started to cry. The only thing I could think "we wont be homeless anymore". So yes, I can say that I have sat in a walmart check out line bawling before. Cross that off my "things to do before I die" haha. I couldn't help it. The weight was lifted.

For some people, buying a house is finding a new place to hang their coat. For us, its a little more than that. It means that we are home. We are back in Washington. We are no longer any form of "homeless". My babies are sleeping in their own beds. They have their own toys, and all of their clothes. This means more to me than anything. We are home.